Dependence...

...the state of relying on or being controlled by someone or something else...

Dependence is an uncomfortable word. It points to weakness and shortcomings. It says, "I can't. I need help. I am lacking." The world is constantly feeding the lie to be self-sufficient (or at least pretend to be), hold your own, and say to others "I'm good." Be independent!!
Father, tonight by Your grace I can say that dependence brings freedom. Dependence brings joy. Dependence brings satisfaction. When I think back on this week and my journey with You I am so thankful that I can be dependent on You! There is tension in my heart to keep this posture and perspective, but You gently remind me of my need for You.
Taylor, the inquisitive 4 year old that she is, has been asking the deepest questions lately. "When will Jesus come back? Why can't I see Him today? What will it be like in heaven?" I love these questions!! It gives me the opportunity to share truth with her and point her to Your glory. I am completely dependent on You for the biblical words to answer these questions on a level she can begin to grasp (and that doesn't keep us up half the night...she likes to talk theology at bedtime)! Thank You for Your truth that can help a 4 year old grow in her love for You and Your glory!! How beautiful to see her eyes light up at the thought of seeing You and being with You forever!
You've reminded me of the mere fact of my dependence on You physically too. Hurting my knee playing volleyball this past Tuesday was definitely not in my plan for this week. I have had to pray through my attitude toward not being able to work out like normal and just the annoyance of discomfort. Father, thank You for not letting it be much of an injury and for slowing me down to show me the unhealthy drive I have toward fitness. I recognize my dependence on You for this perspective to genuinely be where my heart rests.
There is a constant need for dependence in relationships. Not with the other person, but with You. I need Your help to do relationships well. A selfless heart in my marriage; a sacrificial heart in my parenting; a caring heart with those in need; wisdom for those needing counsel; and patience for those hard to love. I can think of all these instances from this past week in one way or another. And it is not anything of me that helps me respond well or admit my weakness when I fail. Thank You for living through me and continually supplying me with what I need when I need it!!
Many times this week dependence has been on my mind and heart because of my weaknesses and failures. In times of losing my temper with my children You've reminded me that I am lacking in gentleness, but You are the gentle Father. In times of not wanting to own my sin in situations You've reminded me that I need help and that You are still changing me. In times of fretting and feeling anxious You've shown me in Your Word that fretting only leads to evil (Psalm 37) and that I can't fill my life with peace, but You are the God of peace and rest. In times of questioning our live's course You've reminded me that I don't know the plans for my life, but that You are a good God fighting for our greatest happiness to be found in You alone and that is Your plan. All of these moments come face to face with my weakness and Your strength!!! For that reason I can say thank You, God, for my complete dependence on You and help me to be comfortable with such an uncomfortable word!